How many of us have had to face our fear? When you have faced fear did you work through it, or did you shy away and do something else? If you did work through you fear was it as bad as you first thought?

Are there many different levels of fear? What is fear really? These questions and many more can be asked and explored about fear!

For me I have had times in my life when I have felt and perceived fear. I also have found that, all depending on the situation at the time, the level of fear can be greater or less. I also see this in my clients when working with them to make changes or even come to some form of understanding within them.

Fear can actually be quite a useful tool at times, as it can be used as a motivator to move forward. Most people however look at fear and see it as a negative. I find people can become quite stuck or paralyzed by fear. So let’s look at what fear is and where does it come from?

Let’s take an example of say, doing a bungee jump! What is your fist thought around doing a bungee? For most people they would think that there is a possibility some thing could happen and they could be hurt. The next thought would possibly be that if they were hurt, then that would stop them from doing other things or even put pressure on someone else to have to look after them.

Once these thoughts start to enter our mind and we start to answer them, then more and more thoughts arise until we create a whole story of what could or can or even might happen. A question to ask yourself at this stage - is what I am telling myself about the bungee true, or just me making up a story based on what I think is true? Unless you have actually already done a bungee the story is not true and is based on what you have heard, read, or watched somewhere.

The next question would be to ask, Well why do I think this might happen to me?  Most likely you will be telling yourself everything you can, so as to not do the bungee, then you will feel safe and life can just go on as usual! If this is something you allow to happen on a regular basis with fear, then usually what will happen over time will be that the fear will become greater and greater until you face it. The only difference will be the story.

What about if we back up a bit and go back to the first thought about doing a bungee? If instead of looking at all the negatives and all of what may happen, and then started to look at what the benefits could be from actually facing the fear and allowing ourselves to overcome the fear - I wonder what the result could be…

 Over the next few weeks I’d like you to write in about a time when you actually did face your fear and what was the result? Or even if you have not faced your fear and would like to look at why you don’t, again please let me know. I will share with you some of these stories and others I have witnessed over the next coming weeks. Until then have a great long weekend and enjoy.

You can contact Jay by phone on +64 (9) 815-7855, or you can email him.