The Art of Phone Sex

Sarah Gibson

Sarah Gibson is the brains and attitude behind the playful adult toy website sexgear . She is also our official ‘sexpert’.

You might live in a different country to your partner or you may live in the same house. Whatever your situation, phone sex is a naughty and exciting way to stay connected while you are apart. So read on for eight tips on how to give good phone sex.

1.  Give Yourself Time
Phone sex isn’t going to be very sensual or sexy if you are trying to squeeze it into five minutes. So before you dial make sure you have plenty of time. You could even arrange a specific time with your partner for the call – so you both have oodles of time set aside. That way you can enjoy the anticipation leading up to it and ensure you are in a place that is relaxing and private.

2. Start with Small Talk
Don’t just launch into the sexy stuff, make small talk with your partner first. Ask how her day has been and then gradually build up the sauce factor; a great way to switch the conversation from innocent to sexy is to ask the old and trusty question “what are you wearing?”

3. Don’t Be Shy
If it’s your first time, then you are bound to feel a little shy or silly to begin with, that will fade away when you find your feet and figure out what to say and how to say it. A good tip to ease the nerves is to close your eyes and imagining your lover is right there beside you.

4. Be Descriptive
During phone sex, words and sounds are the only tools that you have to turn your partner on. So tell your lover exactly what you want to do to her or what you want her to do to you. Try not to hold back and be explicit in your descriptions. Generally the more detail you go into the better – but you know the level of kink that your partner is comfortable with so stick within those boundaries.

5. The Touch
As you and your partner become more and more aroused take it in turns to describe how you are touching yourselves and how it feels.

6. Sound Effects
Sound effects are important so make as much noise as you like. Breathe, moan and pant to convey your pleasure and excitement – your lover will want to hear it and it will help her to reach her peak of arousal.

7. Close to the End
Tell your partner when you’re close to orgasm, this can be just the cue she needs to tip her over the edge and set her arousal levels soaring.

8. The Finish Line
You should both cross the finish line – so if you come before your partner you should continue to ‘stimulate’ her by making sounds and talking dirty. Once you’ve both reached your peak, don’t just make your excuses to get off the phone and hang up. You need to give your partner the telephone equivalent of the post-coital cuddle; especially if you want a repeat performance. Take the time to talk intimately for a while or just be silent at the end of the line and listen to each other’s breathing – whatever works for you. The key is not to put the phone down until both of you feel ready.